13 (dream/nightmare) originally uploaded by Brad Dougherty

On Tuesday night I received a phone call which I must admit left me concerned for the well being of my family. We rarely receive phone calls at the house and if we do they’re from relatives or friends and in this day and age, rarely are marketers stupid enough to follow in the footsteps of Justice a Clothing Store for Girls or Kirby Vacuum Cleaners in Hastings by calling those on the FCC’s Do Not Call List. Unfortunately for the St. Paul Pioneer Press, they are most certainly that stupid and rank even lower than either Justice or Kirby due to the tactics they used twice this week.

Yesterday evening, after we returned home from our first trip of two to the State Fair the phone rings. I find this to be a little odd considering the hour and the person on the other end cautiously announces that they’re calling from the Pioneer Press and that they are aware that I had an issue with a previous call. Knowing that I have not received a phone call from anyone, let alone the Pioneer Press, recently I informed the caller that they had the wrong number. About ready to hang up the phone the person on the other end of the line says, “No, Mr. ‘Roe El’, I don’t have the wrong number. I dialed…,” and then they continue on with, “can I speak with your father?”

Now. This is where I start getting nervous. First off I am on the FCC’s Do Not Call List and have been for a very long time. I made sure to re-up status and as of October 2009 I am registered for life at the number they called on. The Pioneer Press would never make the mistake of calling someone registered on the DNC List right? In addition why would anyone call and speak to my “son” for this long before asking to speak to me? I lost my voice last weekend and I sound like a 90 year old woman who has smoked for 81 of those years. How could they ever confuse me with my “son”? It’s at this point that I ask, “what was the problem again?” The person on the other end of the line says, “no problem here,” and then hangs up.

Aside from the introduction at the start and the mention of the Pioneer Press nothing in the substance of the call makes me believe it’s at all the Pioneer Press calling. I have had some real wackos call the house before, as if there weren’t only a handful of Roehl’s in the nation–let alone the Metro, and think that by finding my phone number they have somehow tracked me down. Was this one of them? Do I need to ready the shotgun by the bedroom door and leave the hunting knife I use to trim my beard while camping under my pillow for the evening or am I just being paranoid?

A restless night of tossing and turning commences with me mulling over the strange phone call from the weirdo claiming to be from the Pioneer Press. All worries cease when the same company calls back today and speak to my wife again claiming that they knew we had a problem with someone we spoke with recently. She tells me she can clearly hear that this person is in a call center and that they now want us to sign up for a free, no obligation trial for 90 days of the Pioneer Press. We wouldn’t even have to call them to cancel. Unless they hear from us they will cease delivery. Sure they will…

Why in the world is the Pioneer Press violating the FCC’s Do Not Call List and having their reps start off the conversation with a statement that they know you had a problem with someone at the Pioneer Press recently? Why are they trying to shove a 90 day free trial down your throat all while claiming it would be easy as pie to cancel? Has the Pioneer Press called you like this? Were you confused by the whole ordeal? Do you think the FCC should levy fines against them for their violation? Whatever you have to say about this one go ahead and comment on as I’d love to hear your thoughts.

When I gave my talk at the Farmer’s Market on Saturday I was asked, I believe by reader Crystal who blogs at Cafe Cyan, what hot sauces do I keep in my fridge. While normally easy for anyone else to answer, it was a difficult question for me to come up with an answer to so I answered with those that I end up replacing most often–Frank’s Red Hot and Sriracha, two of the most commonly used hot sauces on the market today.

My wife pointed out to me my failure as a hot sauce connoisseur by mentioning that these two mass market hot sauces are what I consider to be my go-to sauces. For the sake of time I decided it was a lot easier than going to great lengths in listing all of the ones that I have on hand at any time and use for any number of things including reviewing and/or just taking up space in the fridge because I’m a hot sauce pack rat.

I mean we’ve all been through the list of those that I’ve reviewed here including: Lucky’s, Blair’s Ultra Death Sauce 20/20, San Pedro Pequin, etc. In addition to those I also have Bossman’s Swamp Juice and Ron’s Nuckin’ Futs (both provided to me, following a trip down South, by UpWithTheMooses but I just haven’t gotten around to reviewing them yet).

Yesterday I went to the State Fair and stopped by both the Girvan Grille booth and Singh’s Caribbean Heat to check out what hot stuff they had to offer. Because of rolling power outages across the State Fair, Girvan’s booth was down and out but Singh’s was still open. He not only had fresh, homegrown Ghost Chilies on hand ($5/ea) but also his homemade ghost pepper sauce which he was selling for $50/bottle…

Now while I realize it’s the State Fair and everything comes at a premium, especially sauce made from chilies which do not grow well in Minnesota (I apologized and stood corrected when I told him that I didn’t know of anyone who could grow them in MN and he showed me his softening pile of ghost chilies which looked like they were picked off plants three weeks ago), I cannot see why you would ever pay $50 for his sauce. I took a taste and found it only slightly hotter than comparable habanero based sauces. He says he uses straight ghost chilies for the sauce and he really does need some work, either in the chilies’ strength themselves, or kicking the sauce up a notch.

After chatting with him about Girvan’s wings (I told him I hadn’t had them at the Fair yet, only at the actual restaurant) and how they were most definitely hotter than what he was selling for $50 he had the audacity to tell me that Girvan’s sauce was inferior because, “it’s a bunch of white people making our food.” I seriously stood there in shock, came to, shook my head and told him that was not cool. He gave me a smirk and turned away from me. That’s definitely not the way to sell hot sauces to someone who has no less than 10 of them in his fridge/cabinets at any given time and would happily pay a reasonable rate to get a decent bottle of sauce.

Even though I don’t have a bottle of Minnesota borne ghost sauce in my fridge and I still have $50 in my wallet, I still do enjoy a good hot sauce. Unfortunately with so many of them priced so high I have to stick with the cheap, yet still hot and flavorful favorites, Sriracha and Frank’s. I put them in or on just about everything including spaghetti, burger meat, pretzels, chips, or even my finger or a spoon.

I know that a bunch of you out there enjoy a little hot sauce now and then so why don’t you answer Crystal’s question about which hot sauces you keep in your fridge when you want a little kick? While I’m certainly you don’t go through the estimated 5 gallons I do a year of Frank’s, how often do you have to replenish your stash? Do you ever try new hot sauces or do you just stick to your tried and true favorites? Whatever you have to say about your choice in hot sauces go ahead and comment on as I’d love to hear your thoughts.

For many years I’ve been a huge fan of food shows on TV. When we had DirecTV and a DVR we had a steady stream of food related shows all queued up and ready to rock at our leisure. Now without access to 100 channels of nothing we have to resort to accessing food shows either on Hulu or broadcast TV. Unfortunately because we watch very little actual TV it’s mostly what’s on Hulu.

During the DirecTV years we fell in love with Gordon Ramsey–the UK version. His shows over there, such as The F Word and Kitchen Nightmares are nothing like the sensationalized and poorly edited versions we see through the eyes of Fox here in the US. There were other shows too, many which I cannot even possibly begin to recall, but which we thoroughly enjoyed and we miss them.

The only food related shows we are watching currently are Top Chef (when they are available on Hulu) and MasterChef. MasterChef is a Top Chef knockoff for amateurs only. While I disagree with a lot of their challenges and how they remove people from the show, the foods that are made are quite interesting. I have to admit I’m a bit jealous of people who claim to be amateurs yet can come up with the dishes they do but I really have to question any group, like that, who cannot name more than 9 or 10 vegetables/meats on a table. Seems a little fake.

What food related shows do you watch? Do you have a source for them that isn’t on cable? Why do you like the ones you do? Do you think that Gordon Ramsey’s shows in the US are too sensationalized (think Hell’s Kitchen or Kitchen Nightmares)? Whatever you have to say about food shows go ahead and comment on as I’d love to hear your thoughts.