I’ve been living here more than 10 years and in that time I’ve always pined for the East Coast. In fact, up until a few months ago I was convinced I’d be moving back there soon, now that my masters is complete. Unfortunately, The Wife had other plans and my dreams of moving out East have been dashed. So, in order to make the best of it, I have resigned myself to morph into that of a true Minnesotan. But what does this mean?

Well, to me it means a few things:

1. I have to whine about it being cold and whine about it being hot. Basically I can only enjoy the 2 weeks of spring we have every year and the 4 or 5 weeks of fall. Part of this includes driving very, very, very slow in traffic when droplets of rain fall from the sky or when there is any amount of snow on the road.

2. I have to learn to play cribbage.

While other states have their card games which are played frequently by everyone, such as euchre in Ohio, in Minnesota people play cribbage. Go to anyone’s cabin you know and there is likely to be a cribbage board hanging on a wall somewhere hiding a handful of scoring pegs and a deck of cards.

I’ve played the game a few times at a buddy’s cabin over beers and never faired well. The pace of play is fine and the basic rules are too; however, those beers coupled with all the little nuances of scoring and homemade rules were just too much for me to remember. Well, on my quest to assimilate into Minnesota culture, I decided it was time to really learn how to play.

The Wife found a cute vintage cribbage board set on Etsy from ~1941. It came with the original, and well worn, instruction booklet and a deck of cards which smells like old people. We broke it out last night and while listening to our ‘Jim Croce Channel’ on Pandora, we played the best game for Minnesotans ever–a card game for two people. While it didn’t take long to get the most basic scoring elements nor the gameplay itself, I’m not sure this is going to drive us to become full-fledged Minnesotans. Maybe if we switched from rooster faced cards to ones with loons?

What about Minnesotans do you feel sets them apart from the rest of the nation? Are you a transplant? At what point did you stop saying you were from where ever and instead started saying you were from Minnesota? Do you play cribbage? If so do you have crazy house scoring rules? What other card games do you enjoy playing with your family? Whatever you have to say about this one go ahead and comment on as I’d love to hear your thoughts.

Over the weekend while preparing for our usual Sunday night antipasti dinner of a variety of meats, cheeses, pickles, olives, and bread, I stumbled across two of Great Midwest Cheese‘s products. The two that got my attention, of course, were their Habanero Jack and their . While I had no intention of eating them with our dinner, I picked them up anyway and waited until I had a craving for some cheese.

Last night, while waiting for dinner to finish up, I decided to snack on the cheeses. I cut open the habanero jack round and popped a bit in my mouth. While it carried some heat and it was fine, it was nothing like the wonder that is Cabot’s Hot Habanero cheese. There were noticeable pepper pieces but they were sparsely and unevenly spread throughout the cheese so one piece may give you that spicy bite while another may have none at all. Overall this one was fine but I probably wouldn’t go out of my way to pick it up again as there are plenty of other hot cheeses I would want to nab first.

Now to the star of the show, if you want to call it that…Great Midwest Cheese’s Mango Fire Cheddar. Described as:

Oh, you sweet and spicy thing! Great Midwest® Mango Fire Cheddar cheese is anything but ordinary. Pump up the heat on your palate with delectable sweet mango and bits of hot habanero pepper blended into smooth, firm Cheddar cheese. Perfect on dark rustic breads or grain crackers, enjoyed alone or with a dark icy beer.

This cheese should have been a beautiful and shining example of something that would appeal to most people’s palates. Unfortunately the description needs to be entirely rewritten as:

Oh, you disgustingly gross thing! Great Midwest Mango Fire Cheddar cheese is anything but tasty. Pump up the taste of soap or ultra sweet bubble gum flavored toothpaste with gross bits of mango that taste nothing like the real thing then add bits of habanero that you can’t taste because you’re busy spitting the cheese into your hand while trying to hold back chunks of puke from flying out of your mouth. Perfect for the garbage can or the nearest landfill, not even your dog will enjoy this one and you’ll use a dark beer to wash your mouth out while you roll the package over in your hand looking for the phone number to return the package to the manufacturer for a full refund.

Seriously, this cheese, if you want to call it that, was absolutely and positively one of the most disgusting things I’ve ever put in my mouth. Considering I’ve eaten at Steak America, that’s a really bold statement. Thinking maybe I was just crazy and this was a “dessert” cheese, I handed a piece to The Wife to eat and provide some feedback. She immediately got a horrified look on her face, turned to me with her eyes wide, and asked if she could have something to spit it out into. I provided her with a plastic cup and immediately tossed it in the garbage next to my piece. She then asked me, “what the hell was that?!” and when I told her she looked at me like I was crazy and said it was gross.

Yes, yes it was.

Have you ever had any of Great MIdwest’s cheeses? If so what did you have and what did you think? Have you ever tried their horrendous Mango Fire Cheddar? What did you think? Whatever you have to say about this one go ahead and comment on as I’d love to hear what you have to say.