From the South metro police blotter on the StarTribune. See the original (until the link dies) here.

On March 15th, a kid ignored his mother’s advice and almost froze like that:

Medical. Officer Karen Shaw received a call of a medical emergency at a residence. Upon arrival, Shaw found an 18-year-old man laying on the floor in the living room. “His head was cocked at an odd angle and he told me he was in pain and his neck was stuck in that position,” Shaw said. The man said, “I was talking on the telephone for a long time and my neck is now stuck in this position.”

On March 17th, someone fucked up their car and then people tried to help by picking up the car. I’m not sure what hurt worse:

Auto accident. Officer Karen Shaw was called to a problem with an automobile on a private road in front of Taco Bell. When Shaw arrived, the woman who had been driving the vehicle was standing next to it. A 12-foot pothole had developed and the woman drove into it and couldn’t get her car out. Bystanders had tried to lift the car out of the pothole. A tow truck removed the car. Code enforcement officers are working with the property owner to get the pothole repaired.

Sometime during the week of March 7th and 14th, this guy was just waiting to get on the interstate, why, what did you think he was doing?

Drunk driving. Sergeant Chad Hagen was on patrol late at night when he located a vehicle sitting at a green light at the intersection of 185th Street and County Road 50. The vehicle sat at the green light through the entire cycle and didn’t proceed, so Hagen activated his emergency lights on his squad car and walked up to the car to check on the driver. When he approached the driver, he asked what he was doing. The driver replied, “Just waiting to get on the interstate. Why, what are you doing?” Hagen detected the odor of alcohol and asked the driver to step out of the car to perform a field sobriety test. The driver failed the test and recorded over twice the legal limit. The driver was arrested and taken to jail.

Going back through my reviews from 2007 I found that I visited entirely too many restaurants even though I took nearly three months off this summer. There have been some diamonds in the rough but many, many disappointing experiences. Here’s a quick glance back at where we ate in 2007 (in date order):

1. Enjoy! in Apple Valley, MN.

On January 20th, 2007 we joined up with Aaron, Mindy, Chris, Laura, and Josh to celebrate our close birthdays together. Kim and I had visited Enjoy! in 2004 with my parents and found it mediocre. After reading that Enjoy! had revamped their menu, most likely to compete with the Copper Bleu in Lakeville, we decided to give it another shot and weren’t disappointed.

2. Tandoor Indian Restaurant in Bloomington, MN

On February 2nd, 2007 we met up with Tim and Meredith for an evening of Indian food in a busy strip mall next to a Red Lobster in Bloomington, MN. Three of us thought the food was pretty decent and one of us (Kim) didn’t care much for it.

3. Houlihan’s in Eagan, MN.

On February 16th, 2007 Kim and I tried out the chain restaurant Houlihan’s located right off of 35E in Eagan. Even though I normally despise chain restaurants, this one was far from your usual experience at Chili’s or Applebee’s and we were thoroughly impressed. While we haven’t been back yet, we are planning on it again soon. It currently resides in the top three of our favorite restaurants.

4. El Patio Authentic Mexican Restaurant in Lakeville, MN

On April 20th, 2007 Kim and I went out to El Patio to try it out after reading that Steve Eck and the Star Tribune thought it was noteworthy. The only noteworthy item I could find at this location was that the Star Tribune’s reviewers don’t know their ass from third base about food and shouldn’t be trusted, ever.

5. Two Guys from Italy in Apple Valley, MN

On June 19th, 2007 Kim and I visited this restaurant which went on to become one of our most popular reviews of all time with over 10,000 views and many comments from both visitors and staff. I had my reservations about the restaurant well before I stepped inside and within seconds my opinions were cemented with a sub-par experience and one we will never repeat. Comments from both visitors and staff center on the confusing ordering system, lack of quality food and the fact that the owner has failed in numerous other ventures following the success of his location in Edina that the one in Apple Valley apparently doesn’t even come close to achieving.

6. Tucci Benucch at the Mall of America in Bloomington, MN.

On June 29th, 2007, Kim and I joined up with Laura while Chris was out of town on business and enjoyed an excellent meal in this chain located in the Mall of America. The service was friendly and prompt and the food was definitely better than we ever expected. Chris hates The Mall and will probably never step foot inside again but Kim and Laura are chafing at the bit to get back to have another great meal — maybe while he’s out of town again this spring ;)

7. Satay 2 Go Asian Cuisine and Bakery in Apple Valley, MN.

I had several readers recommend that I try out Satay and for whatever reason it took me several months to get out and get there. All I can say is that I regretted not going there earlier and Kim and I have returned almost weekly to visit this little gem located in the parking lot of Home Depot. This is only Apple Valley restaurant to achieve a spot on our top restaurants list and currently sits as #1 for many reasons including superior service and unbelievably good food.

8. Luxury Sweets Gelateria in Apple Valley, MN.

Kim is more of a sweet treats fan than I am but I enjoy a good gelato or ice cream now and again. This is the only location in Apple Valley where you can get homemade gelato in a large space across from Kami Japanese Steakhouse. I’m surprised they are able to sell enough to survive in their location, especially that another restaurant Jan’s Brown Bag Deli closed its doors so quickly after opening, but they have and they are keeping their loyal customers returning time and time again for those treats.

9. Brianno’s Deli Italia in Eagan, MN.

Another reader recommendation ended up drawing me into this tiny little spot hidden away from the hustle and bustle of Cliff Road just off of Cedar in Eagan on July 19th, 2007. I ate some absolutely excellent sausage, peppers and onions but Kim’s sandwich wasn’t anything but ordinary. If you’re looking for a nice place to get some Italian foods, good meats and some treats, this is your place.

10. Bucky’s Soup Sandwiches Salads in Apple Valley, MN.

On September 23rd, 2007 after much dieting and eating salad, I decided to sneak in to Bucky’s to try out one of the newest restaurants in town. While it was probably too early to give them the fairest of reviews, I was not impressed at all at their offerings and haven’t returned since. It was overpriced and so limited that I honestly have no desire to even give it another chance, especially after they attempted to astroturf on my site with several fake comments posted on my site to try and drum up a positive spin. A big no-no in my book.

11. Copper Bleu in Lakeville, MN.

While I didn’t eat at the Copper Bleu in 2007 (instead we were there way back in December of 2005 on their opening weekend), it was one of the biggest stories in the South Metro when it closed its doors. The debt incurred from the expensive (and ugly) structure was too much to overcome being based out of a Cub Foods parking lot deep in South Suburbia.

12. California Cafe at the Mall of America in Bloomington, MN.

On November 8th, 2007 Kim and I happened by what appeared to be a cute little restaurant in The Mall. With good experiences in the past at other Mall locations we figured it couldn’t be that bad. Unfortunately we were wrong and we are again on high alert when looking around the Mall of America for a place to eat.

13. Stephano’s in Burnsville, MN.

On December 1st, 2007 we joined up with Chris and Laura for what we expected to be an excellent dinner at Stephano’s in Burnsville, MN. Unfortunately what we experienced was nothing short of a pile of shit and by far one of the worst experiences in recent memory. The choice quote from my review was:

An absolute fucking disappointment and one that I will never repeat. Honestly, we’d probably be better off eating at Two Guys from Italy and any of you that read this site frequently know just how much it pains me to say that. Fuck, I just threw up a little in my mouth.

Regular contributer Tearitup, reading about our poor experience had to verify it for himself and also had a sub-par experience, especially for the prices they were charging. I am still, to this day, embarrassed for suggesting that people go there and I apologize to anyone that have been misled by my suggestion.

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We’re looking forward to another great year in 2008. If you have any suggestions for new (or old) restaurants for us to visit, please send them along.

Happy New Year everyone!