No one ever said criminals were smart nor did they say they were stable. While everyone knows this, it’s still pretty damn interesting to read the police accounts of what happens when you run into people who do really dangerous and stupid shit.
Out of Burnsville we have an account of the Burnsville PD responding to a domestic abuse report and while interviewing the victim they came into contact with the accused offender TXT or the original PDF are available.
“I’ll take what’s behind door #1 Johnny!” “It’s two uniformed police officers! You win a trip to jail!”:
L.M.E. stated that the defendant wanted to use her car that day,
and when she told him that he couldn’t because he didn’t have a license, the defendant became
very angry and assaulted her. L.M.E. stated that while she was getting ready for work in the
bathroom, the defendant came in and punched her on her left ear and the left side of her head
with his fist. The defendant also slammed her head into the wall before going out into the living room. L.M.E. said that the defendant again assaulted her in the hallway by pushing her against the wall with his forearm and then placing his hands around her neck and squeezing her throat while slamming her head into the wall. L.M.E. said she felt dizzy and lightheaded as a result of being strangled by the defendant. L.M.E. said it was over an hour before she was able to get out of the building to call for help and that the defendant chased her through the building to the exterior door before he went back to their apartment. Officers went to the apartment with L.M.E. to interview her and while they were there the defendant came back to the apartment. The defendant knocked on the door loudly and yelled, “Open the door, bitch!” Officers opened the door and the defendant was taken into custody.
And in Farmington we have a report of two psychopathic brothers who want to “fucking kill” their “fucking bastard” father by “stealing his power”. You just cannot make this shit up people (TXT and the original in PDF)
We have superheros in Farmington!
While officers were at N.G.K.’s home, the defendant called N.G.K.’s cell phone and left a message. In the voice message, the defendant called his father a “fucking bastard” and asked why he took his brother away. The defendant also stated, “I’m going to fucking kill you.” N.G.K. stated that his sons were telling him earlier that when someone kills another person, they steal their power. N.G.K. said when the defendant returned to his address and pounded on the door, he said, “I’m going to steal your power, Dad.”
Ahh, the fun times we have down here in the South Metro. It’s such a nice place to live! Are you ever concerned about the people who may be living next door to you? Perhaps your lights flicker on and off in the evening as they steal your power. Maybe you get a late night knock at the door and expect Girl Scout cookies but instead find someone telling you to open the door–bitch. Do you have any neighbors you think are psychos or dumbasses? If so, go ahead and let’s hear all about their secret abilities.
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October 15th, 2009 at 8:43 am
This is sad and crime is on the rise in Burnsville according to Chief Hawkins.
http://www.startribune.com/local/63902917.html?elr=KArks:DCiUocOaL_nDaycUiD3aPc:_Yyc:aULPQL7PQLanchO7DiUr
Here is another psycho crime this week in Burnsville.
Upon arrival, officers observed paramedics attending to M.K. and followed the paramedics to the hospital to speak with M.K. about the incident. Once at the hospital, M.K. indicated that she was lying on her bed in her room on the second floor of her apartment, and she stated her door was kicked open by Ewing and then he jumped on her bed, got on top of her, and began slapping her in the face. She stated that Ewing told several females he was with to begin assaulting her and that the females began kicking
3
and hitting her after pulling her off of the bed. M.K. stated at some point shortly after the assault began, Guinn grabbed a beer bottle that had been lying in the room and hit her over the head with it.
Officers observed numerous injuries on M.K. consistent with an assault, including a cut on her head and blood all over her face. M.K. knows Ewing because she had previously been in a relationship with him that had lasted several months. M.K. knew Brittany Guinn because she used to be a friend of hers. There was another party she recognized who was involved in the assault with the nickname “Ta-Ta,†who was subsequently identified as T.F.
http://services.co.dakota.mn.us/complaintSearch/complaint.aspx?ID=8892
October 15th, 2009 at 8:58 am
That Farmington incident made me think of Highlander for some reason.
October 15th, 2009 at 9:55 am
Oh the irony this adds to Phil Vassar at the PAC playing his current hit “Just Another Day in Paradise” for the Mayor and all of the other “Friends of the Performing Arts Center”.
October 15th, 2009 at 10:20 am
Boy am I glad I moved to St. Paul away from all the “Bad Motherf******” in the south metro.
October 15th, 2009 at 10:27 am
heh.
October 23rd, 2009 at 9:05 am
Normally I would just use my name, and the genius I live near probably doesn’t read this anyway, but ah….just in case, call me Anonymous Neighbor for this post.
My neighbor is a dumba**. No other way to put it. Lets just say that when he rolls his garbage out to the curb every week, it tinkles and clanks like it’s full of empty beer bottles (which it is).
On one particular stormy drinking night with friends, he emerged from his drinking cave with some buddies who were equally intoxicated. It was a summer storm, with no rain as of yet, just massive lightning and thunder that seemed to be right over our neighborhood.
This moron decided it would be fun to grab some beers and stand outside UNDER the lightning in broad view of the Universe and tempt fate by laughing and goofing off with his buddies and point at the sky with a guffaw only a mother could love. These idiots stood under the lightning, and I kid you not, mocked it.
I stayed by the window, figuring SOMEONE had to call 911 when one of these fools was struck down, but as it were they went inside when the rain started.
Just a funny, and rather sad commentary on the state of affairs in some South Metro neighborhoods….Unfortunately, I have a million just like it.
November 18th, 2009 at 9:01 am
[...] a followup to Psychos and Dumbasses in the South Metro we now have two Star Tribune South Metro Police Blotter reports to share about Drunks and [...]