It’s really sweet for me to open up Google Reader and find 10 new South Metro news pieces in my Star Tribune South Metro feed. It’s not exactly easy to come up with new material to post about down here because, well, no one really seems to give a shit about what happens South of the River. Well, it would appear that the Star Tribune is having its fair share of digging to find South Metro news too — that or they are getting kickbacks from local businesses to feature them in the paper when there is no real news to cover.
Let’s take for instance today’s two restaurant fluff pieces. The first bullshit story is out of Prior Lake and centers on two guys who plan to ship in a dining car that currently resides in Rhode Island and use it to house a “greasy spoon” in Prior Lake. “What small town doesn’t have a greasy spoon? Well, Prior Lake, unfortunately…the best thing is Perkins, but that’s in Savage. ” Well, that’s not entirely true. In fact, Prior Lake is closer to what I envision as a greasy spoon, The Windmill Cafe, (also in Savage) than say Apple Valley. While the vision of these two will likely be hampered by the stupid downtown redevelopment plans of Prior Lake, the biggest problem I see is that people here just don’t want to eat at places like that — especially artificially created ones. I promise you, no one is going to care that you paid a ton of cash to bring a diner from somewhere else and put it in Prior Lake (which isn’t exactly a hot bed of anything) just so that the residents can continue to head to Perkins, Burger King, or any number of other chain restaurants in the area. I’m not quite sure how they feel that by slinging $3.50 egg plates that they’ll be able to afford to stay in business — even if they get the city council to allow it in the first place.
The next unnecessary fluff piece is out of Burnsville where Jo Jo’s Wine Cafe gets the nod along with a lengthy bit about how wonderful Mayor Elizabeth Kautz is and how she was so fucking instrumental in bringing cancer care to the South Metro. Yes, I’m sure that Kautz had so very much to do with it. If anyone is going to listen to a mayor’s pleas, it’s the health care industry.
What I find extremely odd is the fact that this tiny little restaurant is getting attention for donating $1 from every glass of a specific kind of wine (Hope Shiraz) to Fairview Ridges. So, wow, probably 15% of the cost of the glass (mind you, the bottles are $15)? Great for you. I have a feeling that this is a huge circle-jerk created by Kautz herself to show how wonderful and human she is. After all, she holds weekly pow-wows there at Jo Jo’s and lives right upstairs. Fucking cute eh?
While I have given plenty of shit to the local newspaper, Thisweek, for similar non-sense, I really don’t understand why the Star Tribune is getting involved with this sort of bullshit. How about you stick to real news and keep the fluffy bullshit to Coffee News, the businesses themselves, or keep it in the South Metro Business Briefs section. That way, people won’t be fooled into thinking that these articles are at all important.
Anyone else think that the Star Tribune should stick to real news and keep the “you scratch my back, I’ll scratch yours” bullshit out of their paper or am I just completely out of my mind here?
Related posts:
Posts via RSS
Loading ...
November 18th, 2008 at 9:13 pm
Well, obviously, you’re out of your mind but what does that have to do with the Star Tribune? ;)
There, how do you like THAT piece of fluff?
November 19th, 2008 at 12:03 am
I really want to eat at the Windmill Cafe, I’ve driven past it many times and it intrigues me for some reason.
November 19th, 2008 at 8:14 am
Watch out now – that new subsidized parking lot for Jo Jo’s is going to be PACKED! If you build it they will come….no, that didn’t work. If you build a tiny parking lot and make the taxpayers pay for it, they will come. No, that didn’t work (actually that one kind of backfired). If you announce the mayor drinks here, they will come…no, that didn’t work. I know, I know,…If you tie drinking to a charity, and donate a miniscule amount, they will come. Let’s try that.
Just hang in there til the PAC opens, girls, then business will be BOOMING. You can get that Bill Engvall crowd converted from beer to the ol’ grape juice in NO time. Heck, when the belly dancers start, you are going to have to expand across the street in that empty storefront at Grande Marketplace. (Oops, which empty space do I mean? Take yer pick!) Yep. Its all about culture and improving our lives.
November 19th, 2008 at 9:19 am
That story is why a lot of breast cancer fundraisers get the big eyeroll from me. Call me cynical, but I’m starting to think BC is the best marketing ploy ever (and my aunt is fighting a recurrance of it, so I’m not entirely unsympathetic). I’d really like to see more awareness for ass cancers and the like, but they’re not exactly sexy…
November 19th, 2008 at 9:21 am
P.S. Never underestimate the power of dining cars. For some reason, people love ‘em. You could serve shit on a plate and people would pay $10 for the privilege to eat it.
November 19th, 2008 at 9:36 am
“P.S. Never underestimate the power of dining cars. For some reason, people love ‘em. You could serve shit on a plate and people would pay $10 for the privilege to eat it.”
As evidenced by Mickey’s in St. Paul.
November 19th, 2008 at 9:38 am
After waiting in line for 45+ minutes.
November 20th, 2008 at 1:23 am
Jesus Christ, Bill. If you don’t want to wait in line 45 minutes for griddle-fried Americana heart attack at the picturesque downtown diner, do this:
Drive 10-15 minutes west on Seventh Street, toward the airport, and eat at Mickey’s on West Seventh. Same food, same prices, 24 hours, more booth space. No waiting, I guarantee it. And you’ll be closer to 494/Cedar to get yer ass back to the south metro. Which is a hell-hole, too, I guess.
Dude, do you EVER stop complaining? I realize complaining maybe shows engagement in your community and surroundings, but sheesh.
Skip the fucking dining cars then! And when you visit Mickey’s on West Seventh, and decide THAT sucks too, go next door to Famous Dave’s. Woops. There’s a couple of them south of the river, and they suck.
OK. Another quarter-mile and you’re at Chammpp’s. Woops …. I’ll agree (if you will) that an eight-dollar cheeseburger is a bridge too far, in St. Paul or Burnsville.
So the default position is the choke-and-puke Asian buffet in the same mall as Chammpp’s. Fucking right, it’s cheap, and I’ve eaten there many times, saving kwon while bulking up. Middle-wise.
As far as no one giving a shit what happens south of the river (your complaint), don’t you realize that two metro daily newspaper organizations and at least three community newspaper chains are trying to kick the shit out of each other? And if you think Coffee News COUNTS, obtain a clue.
November 20th, 2008 at 9:45 am
Wow Sheesh…do YOU ever stop complaining?
November 20th, 2008 at 12:47 pm
Ok, on a more serious less complaining note, I went out and got the paper and read the story about the dining car.
The guy sounds like a nice guy, and I hope he gets to start his diner. That said, if he wants his diner to last more than a year or two, he should take the money he was going to spend to ship in a rail car and put it in the bank to help him get through the lean times of a start up business. He should focus on finding a low overhead place that is not to big for what he wants to open, and focus on putting out high quality low cost food.
I grew up on small town diners and greasy spoons. They thrive on locals and regulars who spend 4 bucks a day on coffee and buscuits and gravy, not on destination diners spending 12 bucks per plate. Low overhead, a small space that feels warm and welcoming, and decent blue collar food. People might come in to eat in a dining car once. They may even like it and come back every few months. However this wont keep you in business.
As for the papers covering this stuff, who cares. None of the do much to report real unbiased news anyway. Low expectations are the key to managing disappointment.
November 20th, 2008 at 7:39 pm
Seriously, they give money to Fairview Ridges? Couldn’t they give the money to something that has no large corporate overlord (Fairview)?