Archive for the ‘Burnsville’


Burnsville Center Plans to Attract RNC Attendees

There has been a lot of hubbub about the upcoming Republican National Convention, as if they can somehow recover from the Bush Administration’s atrocities and public disconnect with a 71 year old fart, including $525 shots of scotch and now the ability for Dakota County “destinations” to “shine”.

According to the article, among the many hotels that are looking to book RNC tourists, there are other opportunities for “destinations” such as the vast and exciting Burnsville Center which is looking to attract hotel guests with some sort of promotion. Perhaps they feel that since very few full-time residents actually go to Burnsville Center to buy anything, thus the numerous empty and/or pointless stores (e.g. The $10 Spot) they might be able to entice them to stop in and shop at the same shitty stores they see at home! I’m sure that people cry when they move more than 5 miles away from the nearest Applebee’s, Panera, Dick’s, Bath and Body Works or Victoria’s Secret!

Maybe Burnsville Center will team up with Internet Exposure, Inc to get the same great vacation destination look and feel that the Burnsville Convention and Visitors Bureau is trying to accomplish by attracting those from outside the state cruising up 35 to the rest of Minnesota.

I have a simple suggestion to attract Republican National Convention attendees: start supporting small, local businesses that offer something different from everywhere else. Oh wait, nevermind, the New Aged GOP loves to support Big Business Interests which include screwing the little guy.

Ignore everything I’ve said and continue on trying to detract attention from the Mall of America and the downtown metro areas. I’m sure you’ll do great — all while wasting your money.

Burnsville a Vacation Destination?

According to this article in the Star Tribune (the link will eventually die, sorry), the the Burnsville Convention and Visitors Bureau is attempting to attract visitors from both Iowa and Canada as a destination that offers more than just an overpriced parking garage.

The Convention and Visitors Bureau mentions in the article that people should want to visit Burnsville for such exciting events as the arts and jazz festival in August, the “fantastic” skiing available at Buck Hill, and a “showy horse farm” (whatever the fuck that is). They have a newly redesigned website up, which is what the entire Star Trib article is an advertisement for, here. I suppose when you spend a quarter of your marketing budget on a website redesign, you want people to visit it. IMHO, they should have done some more research before going with Internet Exposure, Inc. A quick glance at Internet Exposure’s own website should have been enough to push them in an entirely different direction.

Anyway, I took a look at the Bureau’s website and found it to be informative enough although full of embellishments. Obviously the Burnsville Convention and Visitors Bureau has an interest in ensuring that the website attracts people but the claim that Burnsville offers 90 restaurants was a bit much for me to handle so I of course took the time to dissect the listing of restaurants so you don’t have to! First off, there are only 89 restaurants listed on their website. Of that 89 over 55 are chains (local and/or national), 18 are repeats (i.e. three different Starbucks), 1 is located in a grocery store and yet another is a grocery store, and finally (Stephano’s Bistro Continental — as it is named on their website) is arguably not even worth listing.

The best part of the Star Tribune article has to be the quote at the end from Tom Hansen who is Burnsville’s Chief of Operations:

Visit the website first, then visit Burnsville, you’ll like it.

Honestly, you’re better off skipping Burnsville, especially because of their unnecessary “Heart of the City” revitalization and drop straight into Minneapolis or St Paul. You’ll pay a bit more but you’ll spend less on the gas driving back and forth between the two. If you’re interested in mass transit, stop in Bloomington instead and enjoy the same (plus many many more) of the same restaurants, shopping areas and amenities that are offered in Burnsville while riding the LRT downtown.

No Burnsville Performing Arts Center? Run for City Council!

After my post two weeks ago about the borked Burnsville Heart of the City, I have been closely following any news about it and came across two letters in the StarTrib from Burnsville residents who are not terribly happy with the prospect of using tax dollars on any project related to the Heart of the City, especially the Burnsville Performing Arts Center.

Cliff Volkmann writes (emphasis mine):

    The tired song that the Performing Arts Center in Burnsville is being built without increasing property taxes is grossly misleading. The millions of dollars are not just falling out of the sky, but tax increment financing funds that were intended to REDUCE taxes for the citizens of Burnsville are instead being used for the theater, and now for the parking ramp. If this isn’t considered a form of tax increase, then the spin merchants have had a field day.

    These are but a few of the fiascoes that should put a bright light on the city officials who don’t understand how to spell.

    Market force should be allowed to develop property to prevent the kinds of three-ring circus events that have developed with the meddling of our city government.

Right on Cliff! Like I said when I posted about the Heart of the City, if a developer is pulling out of the whole thing, it’s obvious that they don’t believe the project is worth it. Why should the taxpayers take on the burden of something that everyone else sees as a drain? While this project won’t end up being like the Duluth Aquarium, it’s certainly not one that we need South of the River and definitely one that the residents of Burnsville should be fighting hard to end.

Thankfully Cliff (above) and Elwood Narum (among others) are:

    It is probably too late to stop this out-of-control boondoggle, but it is not too late to make strong consideration for the future direction and governance for the city of Burnsville. Want to serve your city? Contact noperformingartscenter.com. We are interested in talking to qualified candidates interested in running for mayor and city council. The time for change is here.

They claim to be a grass roots campaign looking for supporters as well as those interested in running for City Council seats in opposition to this huge waste of taxpayer dollars. I wish them the best of luck and I hope that their ideas spread throughout the citizenry of Burnsville and the rest of the South Metro.

Burnsville’s Broken Heart of the City Revitalization


Burnsville’s Nicollet Park Sculpture

Last week I posted a comment about suburbs trying to create an identity for themselves under my post about the completely unnecessary and overpriced Apple Valley Liquor Store #3 which will be located in the complex adjacent to the pointless Apple Valley Target South and it got some interesting discussion going.

Well, a follow-up to that discussion is this story about how Anderson Builders of St Louis Park have decided to pull out of “downtown” Burnsville’s revitalization attempt known as Heart of the City. This “downtown” includes such businesses as Cub Foods, Milio’s Sandwiches and the Grande Marketplace as well as others such as Jensen’s Cafe located on the corner of Nicollet and Burnsville Parkway.

This entire development seems a whole lot like Apple Valley’s lame attempt at creating a “downtown” with the whole Apple Valley Central Village bullshit. It’s obviously going so very well for the suburbs to try and give themselves identities that everyone knows are nothing but attempts at creating more retail space for chain businesses.

Personally I think that this is great news. I can only hope that stories like this will deter the suburbs from their continued quest to become “Little Woodbury” and create these false “downtowns” in the hopes that people will be fooled into believing that they live in a real quaint town and not some dumpy chain-infested hellhole.

2007 South Metro Restaurant Flashback

Going back through my reviews from 2007 I found that I visited entirely too many restaurants even though I took nearly three months off this summer. There have been some diamonds in the rough but many, many disappointing experiences. Here’s a quick glance back at where we ate in 2007 (in date order):

1. Enjoy! in Apple Valley, MN.

On January 20th, 2007 we joined up with Aaron, Mindy, Chris, Laura, and Josh to celebrate our close birthdays together. Kim and I had visited Enjoy! in 2004 with my parents and found it mediocre. After reading that Enjoy! had revamped their menu, most likely to compete with the Copper Bleu in Lakeville, we decided to give it another shot and weren’t disappointed.

2. Tandoor Indian Restaurant in Bloomington, MN

On February 2nd, 2007 we met up with Tim and Meredith for an evening of Indian food in a busy strip mall next to a Red Lobster in Bloomington, MN. Three of us thought the food was pretty decent and one of us (Kim) didn’t care much for it.

3. Houlihan’s in Eagan, MN.

On February 16th, 2007 Kim and I tried out the chain restaurant Houlihan’s located right off of 35E in Eagan. Even though I normally despise chain restaurants, this one was far from your usual experience at Chili’s or Applebee’s and we were thoroughly impressed. While we haven’t been back yet, we are planning on it again soon. It currently resides in the top three of our favorite restaurants.

4. El Patio Authentic Mexican Restaurant in Lakeville, MN

On April 20th, 2007 Kim and I went out to El Patio to try it out after reading that Steve Eck and the Star Tribune thought it was noteworthy. The only noteworthy item I could find at this location was that the Star Tribune’s reviewers don’t know their ass from third base about food and shouldn’t be trusted, ever.

5. Two Guys from Italy in Apple Valley, MN

On June 19th, 2007 Kim and I visited this restaurant which went on to become one of our most popular reviews of all time with over 10,000 views and many comments from both visitors and staff. I had my reservations about the restaurant well before I stepped inside and within seconds my opinions were cemented with a sub-par experience and one we will never repeat. Comments from both visitors and staff center on the confusing ordering system, lack of quality food and the fact that the owner has failed in numerous other ventures following the success of his location in Edina that the one in Apple Valley apparently doesn’t even come close to achieving.

6. Tucci Benucch at the Mall of America in Bloomington, MN.

On June 29th, 2007, Kim and I joined up with Laura while Chris was out of town on business and enjoyed an excellent meal in this chain located in the Mall of America. The service was friendly and prompt and the food was definitely better than we ever expected. Chris hates The Mall and will probably never step foot inside again but Kim and Laura are chafing at the bit to get back to have another great meal — maybe while he’s out of town again this spring ;)

7. Satay 2 Go Asian Cuisine and Bakery in Apple Valley, MN.

I had several readers recommend that I try out Satay and for whatever reason it took me several months to get out and get there. All I can say is that I regretted not going there earlier and Kim and I have returned almost weekly to visit this little gem located in the parking lot of Home Depot. This is only Apple Valley restaurant to achieve a spot on our top restaurants list and currently sits as #1 for many reasons including superior service and unbelievably good food.

8. Luxury Sweets Gelateria in Apple Valley, MN.

Kim is more of a sweet treats fan than I am but I enjoy a good gelato or ice cream now and again. This is the only location in Apple Valley where you can get homemade gelato in a large space across from Kami Japanese Steakhouse. I’m surprised they are able to sell enough to survive in their location, especially that another restaurant Jan’s Brown Bag Deli closed its doors so quickly after opening, but they have and they are keeping their loyal customers returning time and time again for those treats.

9. Brianno’s Deli Italia in Eagan, MN.

Another reader recommendation ended up drawing me into this tiny little spot hidden away from the hustle and bustle of Cliff Road just off of Cedar in Eagan on July 19th, 2007. I ate some absolutely excellent sausage, peppers and onions but Kim’s sandwich wasn’t anything but ordinary. If you’re looking for a nice place to get some Italian foods, good meats and some treats, this is your place.

10. Bucky’s Soup Sandwiches Salads in Apple Valley, MN.

On September 23rd, 2007 after much dieting and eating salad, I decided to sneak in to Bucky’s to try out one of the newest restaurants in town. While it was probably too early to give them the fairest of reviews, I was not impressed at all at their offerings and haven’t returned since. It was overpriced and so limited that I honestly have no desire to even give it another chance, especially after they attempted to astroturf on my site with several fake comments posted on my site to try and drum up a positive spin. A big no-no in my book.

11. Copper Bleu in Lakeville, MN.

While I didn’t eat at the Copper Bleu in 2007 (instead we were there way back in December of 2005 on their opening weekend), it was one of the biggest stories in the South Metro when it closed its doors. The debt incurred from the expensive (and ugly) structure was too much to overcome being based out of a Cub Foods parking lot deep in South Suburbia.

12. California Cafe at the Mall of America in Bloomington, MN.

On November 8th, 2007 Kim and I happened by what appeared to be a cute little restaurant in The Mall. With good experiences in the past at other Mall locations we figured it couldn’t be that bad. Unfortunately we were wrong and we are again on high alert when looking around the Mall of America for a place to eat.

13. Stephano’s in Burnsville, MN.

On December 1st, 2007 we joined up with Chris and Laura for what we expected to be an excellent dinner at Stephano’s in Burnsville, MN. Unfortunately what we experienced was nothing short of a pile of shit and by far one of the worst experiences in recent memory. The choice quote from my review was:

An absolute fucking disappointment and one that I will never repeat. Honestly, we’d probably be better off eating at Two Guys from Italy and any of you that read this site frequently know just how much it pains me to say that. Fuck, I just threw up a little in my mouth.

Regular contributer Tearitup, reading about our poor experience had to verify it for himself and also had a sub-par experience, especially for the prices they were charging. I am still, to this day, embarrassed for suggesting that people go there and I apologize to anyone that have been misled by my suggestion.

We’re looking forward to another great year in 2008. If you have any suggestions for new (or old) restaurants for us to visit, please send them along.

Happy New Year everyone!