Tonight we got a knock on the door at 7:15pm from a teenager dressed in a bright yellow raincoat. I answered the door, why I’m not sure, and was immediately handed a copy of the Star Tribune. The kid jumped right into his sales pitch about selling Sunday edition subscriptions for $13 for 26 weeks and how I would be helping him pay for college because he could earn a $500 savings bond to help him get there.
Well, I have never and will never subscribe to a paper newspaper as they’re pretty much only useful for training puppies and making papier-mache projects. I felt bad for the kid and was also a little surprised that he was out there going door to door, in the rain, and said to him, “sorry man, I read all my news online.”
Well, hoping that this would be it, he continued on about how he really wanted to get this savings bond for $500 so that he could afford college. I hate to break it to him but $500 ain’t shit when you’re going to pay around $150/credit tomorrow and it’s not going to get any better by the time he makes it wherever he wants to go. Anyway, undaunted, I again refused his offer for the Star Trib.
This is when it got really nasty. The young kid said to me, “why don’t you want me to go to college?” He wasn’t looking pathetic mind you, he was just standing his ground and staring at me like I was completely fucking crazy. I stood my ground and repeated that I get all of my news online and he then said, “well you’re only getting the headlines!” Damn, he’s right, I’m not getting a bunch of nearly worthless articles I don’t want to read anyway. Doh, he owned me — errr, no.
Anyway, I didn’t really know what to say to him and was about to close the door when he said, “well, let me have that copy back so I can sell it to someone else.” I handed him the paper, wished him good luck and then sat down to write this post.
What a little shit but good for him, he might actually become a great salesman someday when he learns to become more of a liar and less of a jerk ;)
BTW, those of you at the Star Trib that read my site frequently, I suggest that you do what you can to rein in those that are going door to door to sell your litter box liner. They aren’t going to get you any sales when they’re treating potential customers as I was treated tonight.
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